Can't Let You Go by psychokiller

only chapter

I thank you all for deciding to read this, it was a spur of the moment thing, I was thinking too long on what I'd do if my boy friend broke up with me and then I remembered I had a fic that I wrote last year on the subject, so I altered it a bit and posted it. I hope you enjoy!

"So 'gome you staying over my place right?" Sango asked, looking over at her friend from the corner of her eyes as they drove on the country road.

"Yeah, just stop by me and Sesshou's place so I can pick up my bag" Kagome answered scratching her forehead. The two girls had been friends since before they could remember.

Sango was a very pretty girl; she had long straight dark brown hair, perfectly leveled, and mocha eyes. She was a tomboy mostly (though the two preferred the same things) and she had a fetish for pink, something that Kagome could never understand. Kagome was looser of the two, where Sango drive everywhere, Kagome, even though she had a car and a boyfriend who'd willingly drive her anywhere, preferred to skate. She was the skater girl. She had thick black wavy locks that stopped about her waist and unusually blue eyes, something that was not natural in Japanese heritage.

Sango turned down a suburban type road and stopped at one of the cottage styled houses. Kagome got out of the car and shut the door. She rounded Sango's car and bypassed her boyfriend's car, which was unusually parked by the sidewalk instead of in the garage like it normally was. She ignored the uneasy feeling of her gut and proceeded to the house.

The front door was left ajar.

'Maybe he left something and came back for it' she thought, pushing her headphones off her ears to rest on her t-shirt clad shoulders. Stepping into the cozy house, she saw nothing out of place and shrugged, he keys were where they normally were, his bomber jacket was hung up, so why was the door open and his car out front?

She grabbed the banister and hopped up the stairs two by two like she usually did, calling his name, hopefully he could answer her curious questions; well he should be able to answer them.

"Sess" she called again, but got no answer, she shrugged it off and decided to ask him when she got back from her weekend at Sango's. She reached the master bedroom of the two-bedroom place and opened the door. Out of reflex the shut back the door and leaned on it. She did not just see that!

She blinked a couple times and took a deep breath before opening the door again. She looked in the room, there was her boyfriend of five years standing up in the middle of the room with a sheet around his naked hips looking as if he'd been caught doing something he wasn't supposed to do.

They just stood there looking at each other, she couldn't move, her throat constricted. She wanted to cry she could feel the pressure on her throat, but she couldn't. She just couldn't. They stood there for what seemed like an eternity, Kagome's mind shut down, it became silent, all she saw was him; she didn't know what to do.

Then the bathroom door opened and a ruffled head of hair popped out. Kagome's attention shifted to the other figure clad in a bed sheet. All at once everything came rushing back to her, sounds of the neighborhood, the yelling of slipknot from her headphones and the sound of fabric ruffling as the girl stepped out of the bathroom to stand beside Seshoumaru.

"Kagome-" Sesshoumaru started but that really snapped her back to reality, the reality where she just caught her boyfriend cheating on her.

She, in one fluid motion, spun, bent over and picked up her duffle bag that lay innocently at the door and walked to the stairs. She started down the flight when Sango walked in through the door.

"I came to see what the hold.... up...was. Kags what's wrong?" she said taking in her friend's blankish glare in front of her then the toga wearing Sesshoumaru walking out of the bedroom. She didn't know what to think.

"Lets go" Kagome said as she walked past her friend and out the door.

"O-ok?" she said then with one last look back at Sesshoumaru, she stepped out of the house and locked the door.

**********************************

"Kag, what happened back there?" Sango asked as she drove them back to her house. Kagome hadn't said a word since they left; she only glared out the window. She hadn't even moved!

"He was in there, in our bed, fucking another girl" she stated after a few minutes, after saying what she saw aloud, the tears came, she acknowledged what it was and now she could finally cry.

"The bastard, did he explain himself at all?" she asked glancing over at her friend and rubbing her shoulder in a comforting manner while driving and keeping them from accidents.

"No, he just stood there, in his toga looking extremely guilty" she sobbed.

"You didn't tell him off?"

"No, I froze, it wasn't till he called my name that I moved, I just took up my bag and left. I couldn't say anything, what was there to say?"

Sango pulled into her complex and parked. She turned off the car and pulled her friend into a hug, stroking the girl's hair, calming her down. "Its gonna be ok Kags. Its gonna be ok"

*****************************

Sesshoumaru sat down at the edge of the bad and sighed, glaring at the floor below him. How could he have been so stupid? How could he have let Kagura seduce him like that? What came over him?

He had merely stopped by the house to pick up his portfolio, for his art class, and keys before Kagome came home and locked them up in the house when she came for her bag to spend the weekend at Sango's. Kagura had snuck up on him when he was in the room and he didn't even remember (or want to relive) what went on from there.

He mentally flogged himself, how could he have been so stupid? Kagome came to mind when she had opened the door and swiftly closed it back. He had rolled off of Kagura and said girl ran into the bathroom with a sheet around her. When Kagome reopened the door, he froze; they stood there looking at each other.

Kagome just looked at him, she didn't move she didn't speak it was like she was incapable of doing anything. Only when she saw Kagura come from the bathroom and he called her name did she snap back from her little stupor. She had fled the room and the house; she didn't want to hear any of what he had to say. And he couldn't blame her. What he did was unacceptable and he had to make it back up to her.

Kagura slinked onto the bad and kissed Sesshoumaru on the neck. He shoved her off himself before getting up and going into the bathroom. "Get dressed," he ordered coldly before locking the door. He dropped the sheet and stepped into the shower, turning the water on the coldest. He didn't deserve any luxuries at the moment.

He needed to find away to make it up to Kagome; he had betrayed her trust and sullied their bed. Kami knows he had a lot to make up for. And he'd do any and everything to get her back. He loved her and he couldn't imagine life once again without her.

***************************

The two girls sat in the den of Sango's townhouse. They had once shared the place until Kagome moved in with Sesshoumaru a couple of years back. The girls had gotten the heads up to live together since their last year of high school and the their parents had bought the house and helped the two furnish it. It was their graduation presents and congratulatory gifts for getting into Tokyo U. both were studying medicine. Though Kagome took art and dance as minor courses and Sango took History and a Weapons course as her minors.

"So what are you gonna do about it?" Sango asked dipping her spoon into the tub of cookie dough ice cream.

"What CAN I do about it? It's already happened, so I can't stop it, and I'm already over here so I can't scream my head off at him" Kagome answered while licking her spoon. She was being very calm about this, something Sango secretly admired about her friend. If it were her, she'd beat the guy to a pulp before asking any questions, but that's just her.

"Well, there is something called a telephone, you can yell at him there?" Sango suggested.

"Nah, I don't really wanna have any confrontations of any kind at the moment. I just wanna enjoy my long weekend at my house with my sister" she confided before plopping the spoon in the carton and getting up off the bar stool.

She walked over to the radio and changed the station form an all metal all the time station to one that was currently playing oldies. Kagome began to dance to the song 'Escape' by Jimmy Hendrix. Singing along with the song.

"If you like pina colada, and getting caught in the rain..." she sung, flailing her hands about herself. Sango laughed at her friend, she looked really weird in a dirty grey montley crew concert tee and boys cut off jeans dancing to the pop song.

"C'mon Sango, you know you wanna" Kagome said calling her friend over to the 'dance floor' with one last laugh Sango hopped off her stool and began dancing with her friend using her spoon as a mic.

When the song ended, both girls fell in the couch laughing. As their cackles died down Kagome looked at her friend seriously.

"What's wrong?"

"You wanna go to the skate park tomorrow?" she asked,

"Sure"

***************************************

The two skated down the road, their time at the skating park spent. They were going to order pizza and rent a movie, and then probably go to the party that was being held at the mall that night.

They were grinding on the sidewalks and doing small tricks here and there in the complex. There was a loud horn and tires screeching. The two looked and saw a purple Pontiac stop in front of them as they were crossing the street. They let it pass,

"Asshole, don't you know your not supposed to be going that fast in a community!" Sango yelled at the car, Kagome just broke down laughing behind her. "Hey, he could have killed us!" she yelled at her friend.

"No its not that, you just looked like an old mother just a while ago" she said then began her mirth anew.

"Well maybe I am, and my immature brat is laughing her head off behind me" she scowled playfully.

"Hey! I'm not a brat!" Kagome defended.

"But you are immature"

"What's your point?"

"Good afternoon Sango, Kagome" came Sesshoumaru's silky voice behind them. Sango turned and saw him leaned against his car in her driveway. She nodded at him and took Kagome's board

"I'll see you inside" she muttered to the girl before going inside.

Kagome stood in front of him and folded her arms over her chest. Sess looked her up and down, she had on a dark yellow t-shirt that looked 3 times too big for her and read, 'Due to lack of interest, tomorrow has been cancelled" and a pair of black cargos with her black vans. Her messy hair was in a low ponytail that blew in the passing wind. "What do you want?" she said cutting to the chase, she really didn't want a confrontation yet. It was too soon.

"Kagome can Rin stay over?" A bubbly voice chirped from the back of the car. A raven coloured head popped out of the open window and the cute girl grinned.

"Sure Rin. I don't see why not," she answered lifting the girl from the window and putting her on the ground, the ball of energy sped into the house greeting Sango loudly. "Thanks for bringing her over" she said to him reaching in through the window for the girl's bag.

"Kag, I wanted to apologize" he started but was cut off from a yell from the car.

"Sesshou are we leaving or what?" it was a feminine voice, Kagome glared at the man before her.

"You brought HER here? Talk about adding insult to injury" she scowled.

"I can explain"

"I really don't want to hear it at the moment. Goodbye Sesshoumaru" she said then shouldered the bag she walked past the car and into the house, slamming the door behind her.

Sesshoumaru sighed and got in the car, he started it and sped off.

"I still don't see what's so great about her" Kagura commented, "Her hair's so frizzy and unruly. She's not even pretty, and what was she wearing?"

"Are you quite done?" she snapped at her, "I will not have you talking about my girlfriend like that"

"That's not the was I saw it. Seems to me you're a free man" she grinned seductively at him.

"You are here for one reason and one reason only. Remember that!"

"Yeah, yeah, to learn my way around. I know, I know"

"Nothing more"

"You've been doing a fantastic job of it might I add" she purred, he glared at her and sped through a red light.

****************************************

The three girls sat down in the den watching 'Hostage' (it was rin's idea) they were so into the movie, they jumped every time there was a gunshot. They were currently cheering for the bad guy Mars, because he was positively to die for, even Rin was yelling her 'I love you's to the screen when something happened. The popcorn finished but no one noticed after a while.

Then Mars died...

"NNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.............................." rang through the house as he burst into flames.

"So who wants to go play now?" the seven year old asked looking at the two collage students as she turned off the T.V.

"Hey Rin you wanna go over to Kaede's for a while and play with Shippou?" Kagome asked stretching her back.

"Yeah! But where are you going?"

"Were gonna go down to the mall for a little bit."

"OK okaa" Rin replied happily. She was Sesshoumaru's adopted sister, but she had taken a great liking to the boy and dubbed him her father, then she met Kagome, Sesshoumaru's girlfriend and found and instant bond with the girl. The couple treated her like they were her parents. No one seemed to mind.

Sango and Kagome quickly got changed for the party before dropping Rin off at Kaede's house, two houses down. They took off for the mall dressed in their normal attire: Sango in a black tank top and a black mini skirt, she had on some silver jewelry and black boots, and Kagome in a white shirt, that stuck to her chest and stopped above her abs it read 'La Fee Verte' (French for the green fairy), and a pair of black cargos and sneakers.

They arrived at the mall, parked and walked in, they looked over the railing down to the food court, the crowd was dancing and having a good time, people had glow sticks, beer, cigarettes. They noticed that Inuyasha, Sesshoumaru's younger brother, 's band, 'Bitter Pill' was playing and they could see Inuyasha motioning for them to come down.

"What's up?" she asked as they finally reached the 'backstage area', behind a Roscoe's Chicken and Waffles.

"We need some help, we need a guitarist, Miroku was groping some girl and she hit him hard, he fell and bruised his wrist on a railing" he answered, glaring at the boy who feigned innocence.

"Serves the pervert right" Sango muttered

"But my dear Sango, I was merely brushing a bug off of her skirt!" he defended with a pout.

"So you want me to play in his place." Kagome said slowly.

"Yeah."

"What songs are you playing?"

"Um, I hate, and Break Stuff, since its almost lock up time"

"Ok" she said then followed him onstage.

*************************************

Sesshoumaru walked into the mall after Kagura, she had forced him into carrying her there, and he scowled at her gyrating figure in the crowd. A song from the live band just ended and the crowd was applauding, he looked onstage and noticed his brother's band, he couldn't remember the name at the moment. Then something caught his attention, the guitarist. It wasn't the pervert; it was Kagome. What was she doing here?

Inuyasha was shoving the mic in her direction but she refused it. He obviously wanted her to sing the next song, but why? What was so special about it that she had to sing it?

She finally relented, and grabbed the mic from him, she walked up close to the audience and smiled at them.

"You guys having a good time tonight?" she asked and the crowd cheered their answer. "Are yall tired?" again they cheered their answer. "OK"

The guitar behind her started the tune off with light even strums. "Every time we lie awake, after every hit we take" she sang, the crowd went wild with the song, "every feeling I get, but I haven't missed you yet" the drums came in and so did the bass. She had closed her eyes, no doubt envisioning him as she yelled the chorus.

"I Hate Everything About You, Why do I LOVE You? I Hate Everything About You, Why do I LOVE You?" she reached for her guitar and began playing while she sang. Looking out into the crowd. Sesshoumaru looked around him, he saw Kagura not too far form him making out with some guy, and he noticed Sango and Miroku who had a wrap on his wrist, also making out near him.

"Only when I stop to think about you, I know. Only when you stop to think about me, do you know" she sang the bridge, he looked up and their eyes met, hers glistened and he knew she was holding back tears. When the drums jumped in once again, she slid her eyes closed. "I hate everything about you, why do I love you! You hate everything about me, why do you love me! I hate, you hate, I hate, you love me! I hate everything about you, why do I love you!"

The song ended and Kagome stepped away from the mic, she took off the guitar and stepped off stage. Sesshoumaru immediately went after her.

**************************************

Kagome jumped off the last step and stepped into the crowd, she sniffed lightly and wiped her eyes of the moisture that formed. That had felt good, venting like that, it felt wonderful, but when she saw him, her heart sank. He probably thought she hated his guts or something, but she didn't, she only hated what he did. She loved him with all her hear and it hurt her to be angry like this, she just wanted to jump him and kiss him senseless, but that couldn't happen, not right now.

She past Sango and Miroku on a bench playing tonsil hockey and smiled despite herself, she knew the two liked the other; they just needed a push in the right direction. She sighed and decided that inside was too stifling so she took the stairs and went outside.

She looked up at the sky and sighed it really was a beautiful night.

"Kagome, I really want to apologize to you" she whipped around and saw Sesshoumaru standing behind her, he looked positively miserable, in his black Alice in Chains concert tee and torn jeans. She looked up at him, tears streaking her face. He walked closer to her and wiped them away with his thumb.

"I am so sorry, I don't know how it happened, but I regret it, I've regretted it every second, and I'm sorry I hurt you" he whispered.

"Who is she?" she asked, she wanted to know, she'd never seen her before.

"She's the daughter of one of my father's associates, she was visiting here for a business deal and he told me to show her around the city. That afternoon I went back to the house to get my portfolio and my keys before you came to get your bag, she came up to the room and I don't even know what she did."

She looked up at him, "I'm not angry with you," she whispered, "just at what you did. It made me feel, I don't even know how to describe it, but it hurt. Seeing you there with another girl like that. It made me feel that maybe you were getting bored of me" she hugged herself

"I could never do that, I love you too much Kagome, it was a stupid mistake"

"I can never stay mad a you Sesshou, and I don't know why" she smiled a wet smile.

"I'm just too adorable that's all" he said hugging her.

"Yeah whatever" she muttered and hugged him back, he lifted up her chin so she looked at him.

"Kag do you forgive me?" he asked; she nodded. He leaned forward and covered her lips with his.

~*~owari~*~

I hope you enjoyed this as much as I did; I'm not in my melancholy mood anymore because of this, my venting. If you think Kagome was too soft in this tell me. I slightly think so too, but that's just how it came out, and I think Sess was a bit OOC but that cant be helped, not many people can write him in character, and I'm afraid that I'm not one of them. :) oh if you can think of a name that fits this, please tell me, because I can't think of any.

I hope you liked this. Plz review, I love to hear from you!!!!!