LOL! That was mean. Therefore...

Granted, but it only plays Jaken singing.


I wish I knew what to wish for.

granted but they are so tiny no one can see them without a microscope.

I wish i could magically heal my wrist

Granted but it was only for a few seconds.

I wish I had wings

Granted but right when you take it out you drop it and the screen breaks.

I wish that it wasn't so hot in Hawaii!

Granted, but not it is freezing and you have no winter clothing. You recieve frostbite and your fingers must be cut off.

I wish I wasn't allergic to anything.

granted, but its a toy ship.

I wish I was a demon

Granted; but then you lose your voice

I wish I was sleeping

Granted, but it only has one shot, and you accidentally shoot your foot.

I wish that I didn't have to say this.

Granted, but before your lips touch the rim of the can it freezes.


I wish my cat would stop digging his claws on my thigh...arg

Granted: you live alone in the Sahara Desert by cactus. Lots and lots of cactus...

I wish I had an ice-cold, root 44, diet Dr. Pepper to drink right now.

Granted, but now you have to carry a sign that says, "I will F**k for food..."

I wish I lived alone.

granted now your house is freshly painted in bright bright bright lime green
=P

I wish that I can be on a permanent vacation.

haha me too...wait, I mean granted but now it falls back one hour everyday for 23 days.

I wish someone would paint my house for free!

Granted, but now she is smarter than you.


I wish there was no more Springing forward....

granted but it's worm caserole

=P

I wish my friend would stop thinking she's smarter than me. (Before I whack a frying pan across her stupid head)

Granted, but it doesn't knock any sense into them.

I wish I had dinner already made.

granted except now it's snowing inside your room
=P

I wish whoever told my friend that BEBE is high end gets whacked in the head. Hard.

Granted, but you read pokemon instead.


I wish it wasn't so hot in my room.

Granted but its the foot.

I wish i didnt read the latest bleach chapter.

Granted but your kids eat them all before you even get a sniff of them.


I wish I had some Sesshoumaru cake.

Granted, but it's chunky and smells bad.

I wish I had a bag of potato chips.

Granted, but it runs away from you.

I wish I had some rain.

Ever the classic! For those of you that have never heard of this before, the rules are simple: the poster before you makes a wish, then you describe how it happens but is corrupted, then make your own wish. For example:

Wish: I wish I was a millionaire.
Corrupted: Your wish is granted. A programming error transfers a million dollars from Bill Gates's account to yours, but you are accused of Internet theft and a jury finds you guilty as charged. You'll be out with good behavior in ten years.

The rules are simple enough.
1) No paragraph-long wishes or wishing for "everything exactly how I want it."
2) If you corrupt a wish, you have to wish for something else.
3) Keep it in good humor please.

I'll start us off:

I wish I had a soda.

You get the soda; but, when you open it, it sprays all over your face.

I wish for a portal to open up in me room.

Granted, but it opens on the ceiling, and you can not reach it before it closes.

I wish for a puppy.